These are the 7 unwritten rules you should know about sex without compromise

Although sex without commitment does not look for complications, the truth is that it deserves a minimum of effort to make it go well. It is also necessary to establish a series of limits so that there are no misunderstandings between you and your dating and make sure that you are on the same page.

Although it goes against popular belief, I am totally against those who say that sex with love is better than sex without commitment. For me, sex is like basketball: a pleasant activity that can be done alone or with others and with different degrees of seriousness. And team basketball can be very exhilarating.

After four years of being part of a closed and exclusive couple, the normal thing is that your correspondent knows what are those things (from four to six) that really turn you on, your vices, and your "I don't do it even if they pay me ". You are not afraid to give instructions. But sex with the same person, with whom you also have a mounting debate regarding that stain on the ceiling of your kitchen, can also end up becoming an endless spiral of boredom, which does not exist when it comes to maintaining sex without commitment.

Casual sex, of course, can wreak havoc because of novelty or lack of intimacy - we all have stories to tell inspired by that crazy night that turned out to be a fiasco. However, it offers you a new experience every time you practice it. Just as it is pleasant to want to be in a hotel room even when you wouldn't want to live in one forever, there is something inherently sexy about the idea of ​​undressing and sharing pleasure with a person without thinking outside the box.

Because the delicate bubble of casual sex breaks so easily, here are seven rules you need to know before diving into this ocean of uncompromising pleasure.

Always be prepared

If you are in the non-binding pickup market, get used to the idea that you are going to return home accompanied at night. Although you will inevitably end up in your dating home from time to time, you must make sure that your apartment is in perfect condition not only occasionally, such as the sex you want to have with your conquest. Have more than one towel on hand. Have extra pillows. Make your guest comfortable (you're not opening a fancy spa either).

The most important thing to have on hand? Condoms No comments like "it's just not the same", "I'm not so sorry", "it doesn't fit me" or "it doesn't give me so much pleasure": have condoms of all kinds if necessary. If you want to have occasional sex, the presence and use of condoms is mandatory.

Let it go

Casual sex, like a delicate mousse, is deceptively complex, can be easily ruined, and is best enjoyed when it flows naturally. The idea is that this is not the time or place to talk about how you are dealing with the fact that your father has a new girlfriend after your mother has moved to Barbados.


Casual encounters can be reduced to just that task, sex, or they can be preceded by a few drinks at a bar in your area that is nice and friendly. This is the time for banal conversations, such as knowing where the other person is from. This is not to say that you should be boring or taciturn, but you should keep the conversation flowing and easy. Ask your flirt about their favorite movies, books, or singers, for example, but not about whether they invest in bitcoins or how much taxes they have had to pay to the Treasury. Talk about that expert wine tasting you learned on YouTube or show him a video of a dog trying to climb a tree to bring down a squirrel of the branches. But never touch on complex or sensitive topics.

Don't suggest questions that might show you're on a date (food, museums, and the like). This is no accident. Thus, a non-exclusive relationship is not maintained. Or rather, that way you don't prepare someone to tell you that you just want sex.

Don't despair of wanting to make a good impression

Casual sex is not the best time to try new experiences that are completely out of your comfort zone: it is one thing to have sex in the car and quite another to try sadomasochism. Being willing to do anything, in this case, means "being willing to perform fairly common sexual acts that we both feel comfortable with, perhaps with some improvised or fun twist," not that you should fulfill your most perverse fantasies.

Save the tough questions for after the second round

If you hook up with someone once - for example, a person you've met through a dating app or a drunken snogging at the house of a friend you have in common - you don't need to write to each other the next day. The sine qua non of casual sex is that it requires little effort on both sides.

However, if you start to share too many messages, you need to set limits, especially when interacting with other people. At that point, you can suggest something like, "Is it okay to keep this informal? It's okay if you don't want to, I'm asking to make sure we're on the same page because I don't want to end the relationship." If you continue to have unattached sexual encounters later, establish more specific rules and accept that this is not the last time you are going to bring up the subject. Casual sex, in the end, requires some work after all ...

Do not entertain

Spending time together inevitably leads to intimacy, whether you like it or not. If you stay in contact with someone long enough, you become their friend, then their friend, and suddenly their partner. I'm not suggesting you grab your pants and jump out of the fifth-floor window in true 'Mission Impossible-style. I'm just saying that breakfast is an intimate act, as is snuggling together for hours. And it is that intimacy and chance tend to extinguish each other.

Learn to interpret the signs

Most non-committal relationships don't start with "Would you be willing to have sex tonight with no expectations for the future and without any kind of commitment? I'm thinking let's do it for 4-6 months and let our relationship slowly fade as it goes. other people entering our lives ". This does not mean that it is useless to be direct and open but to explain what sex without commitment requires (like all categories of sex, it requires absolute consent).

In a casual relationship, however, they may never explicitly "break up" with you. They may never tell you that they don't want you to sleep over after having sex. If you are friends or acquaintances, you both may have to renegotiate your friendship. You may have to figure out what role you play on important dates, like their birthday. Because the relationship is so casual, much of the communication is very superficial and does not rely on deep, emotional conversations. Do not ask for it or expect it from your dating. You may also be interested in dating cuckold sites

Don't complicate things

This is actually rule number one. You are not dating and you have no right to blame what the other does in their free time or debate about who else you are seeing. You only manage to set limits, and if the other person doesn't agree with it, you have a problem. Don't be possessive. Don't gossip on his Instagram. Don't change your Facebook status to "In a relationship." Don't go looking for her parents at the airport. Relax, do your best, and have fun.